Holiday Observations 2

The first Holiday Observations was the penning of sights & stories from going on Holiday with my (now ex) girlfriend’s family. You can read about it HERE. 

Holiday Observations 2 on the other hand is a shitty write-up-byproduct of fleeing to Darwin for a few days post shotgun to the heart.

Crying, blowing my nose, and generally being sad seemed like it would be better with some 30+ degree heat and family. My mum was up north to help look after her Dad while alzheimers takes what’s left of who he is. I figured we could probably use each other at the moment.

There are 6 stages to grief.

Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance and Cars (no wonder I’ve become single).

Breaking up was one of the biggest challenges I’ve faced. Three, nearly four years, countless highs & lows, some of the best memories, and a fantasy of a future together.

All over after a painful conversation. The next morning even worse. The nightmare real, reality ahead of you. Almost in disbelief I did a few things to keep myself alive. I went for a punishing run, reached out for help from a mate, decided to go to Darwin, bought The Big Issue and cried so much it could have solved the drought we had a few months back.

If I had to write a guide on how to survive being dumped I’d definitely include buying The Big Issue. My life is awesome, I didn’t want to let the chest wound get the better of me. Nine dollars for some perspective, bargain.

The flight to Darwin is nearly four hours. I finished a book by William McInnes & watched a movie on my phone.

Love The Beast. 

A film about Eric Bana, his mates and his Beast. Before boarding the flight I hated cars. I never wanted to drive them ever again. I’d decided they were a deficiency in my personality and in part responsible for me not saving my relationship. It wasn’t all the other things wrong with me, no I had to have something specific to blame.

Eric Bana put that to rest. Cars are cool, but certainly not the be all and end all. However, this is a blog mostly about cars...

Although, the name Corner Stories refers to my corner of the internet, dedicated to some muppet who likes his own thoughts too much.

I was staying with my grandma, one of my hero’s. She used to drive a 3door Grand Vitara and is one of the reasons I bought mine (we have both since sold them). Nowadays she gets about in a RAV4 hybrid. A soulless but practical car, that at least affords me some experience with a hybrid. Really I have no place to criticise it, I suggested she buy it.

I was reading at her small round kitchen table when she brought over an article in the paper for me read. John Connolly - Five Reasons not to buy an EV in Australia (YET). Good thing the Rav is a hybrid. 

I was still in that stage where everything would remind me of the now ex-girlfriend, the RAV4 no different. I was there to watch her buy her first car. A 1999 RAV4 with a sunroof, tri spoke wheels and glass headlights. I was very proud of her, she found the car herself and bought it without my help. Compared to the RAV4 I was borrowing, it had so much personality. I cried and decided to read what John Connolly had to say. After all some EV bashing would comfort my recent VE Ute purchase.

The Darwin Festival was on. I didn’t want to be sad all the time. I walked around town before finding myself at the wharf. With a limited budget I decided being hungry was inevitable, I deserved a treat. So I sat down at my table away from people, ate 6 oysters, drank a few ghee&tees and watched the horizon turn from peach to darkness. I also decided to buy a ticket to the festival. It was the last night of the festival and I could dance after a having few drinks in a town where no one knew me.

The entertainment was great, I was having a good time. That being said I was lonely. I figured finding some night-out-mates wouldn’t be difficult, except every bloke seemed to be made out of tuff-stuff and focused on girls. No luck. Instead I tried the chicks. A few were dancing with me but there isn’t really any place for a conversation on the D-floor, nor any intent to follow me to the bar. I don’t blame em. Eventually on route back from the bar to D-town I spotted some chicks I had been dancing with earlier now sitting down. They were well dressed, less hippy more fancy. I figured maybe like me - from outa town. I walked up to them trying to think of something really cool or really funny to say but of course just introduced myself including I was from Adelaide and didn’t know anyone (loser). I mean what was I meant to do? 

Anyway, turns out they were from Sydney and very excited to have me sit with them. One said something implying it would be nice to have some muscle around. I assumed they had to be kidding, compared to the tuff-stuff I was made of plasticine. I took it on the chin. We did introductions and somehow I pulled it together, sneaking in observational humour and banter. I became one of the girls, a unique situation for one of three brothers, whom went to an all boys school.

They were 28 and had real money. I had many more drinks but not outa my pocket. I would announce every drink was my last, but they kept buying. Eventually I had to explain who the girl on my lock screen was which got me a bunch of sympathy and assurance that at 23 I was too young to worry about such things. I collected a few life stories without having to give up mine, which is always a relief. They kept trying to tell me about this gay circus act they had seen the night before at a place called Shenanigans. The circus people were now at the festival dancing near us. One bloke who I had been told could hang from his mouth kept getting awfully close to me. I told him the girls were obsessed with him and totally mind blown. He was pumped and took us back to his table with the rest of the troop. The girls were very stoked, I felt I’d earned my free drinks. 

 
At 2:00am the festival was over and the circus people wanted us to come kick on with them. I said goodbye to the girls. They asked what I was doing tomorrow, explaining they were going to the pool at the casino. I said I didn’t know yet, problem for another day (trying too hard to sound cool). They asked where was home and how was I getting there? I told them I was going to walk to Fannie bay and we laughed about it for a bit. Then for some pathetic reason I shook their hands and began the over an hour long walk home.

I was glad I’d managed to have some fun. Oh and the cars aspect... well I saw this yellow VE Ute at a dealership on the walk home. 

I thought about John Connolly. He wrote ‘Petrol drivers don't wake up worrying their fuel tank will die and cost more than the car. EV drivers do.’

He’s probably right but then again EV drivers don’t have to worry about Holden's 3.6l Alloytec. Eh, I’m 23, why worry about such things?

The cover on The Big Issue said ‘For the love of the game’

It confused me. I had decided to follow the ethos - don’t hate the player, hate the game. But now The Big Issue was telling me hatred of any kind isn’t worth it?

Something went wrong, somewhere, a long time ago. It left me barracking for North Melbourne in the AFL.

So I flicked through The Big Issue to read musician & Roos supporter Tim Rodgers write up on Shinboner Spirit first.

Tim Rodgers wrote 'Watching the Roos is often followed by a very brisk, long walk to allow my insides to regain their architecture' This is a good way of describing what the walk home to Fannie Bay was like.
 

Tim Rodgers reminded me of Dad talking about Paul Kelly going to Norwood games in disguise. For the love of the game I guess? I got distracted and listened to Paul Kelly. I chose the song ‘Before too long’ for the last car I wrote about. For some reason I thought the line Every dog will have its day referred to death. I had to put down the last family dog with dad. It had nasal cancer. It was quite young. I think Paul Kelly meant something different but perspective depends on where you're standing.  So after the Vet did their hard job I walked home not only to let my ‘insides to regain their architecture’ But look at what’s ahead. The lyric after is Any dog can win - I chose to read what Tim Winton wrote about Freo. I hope Freo wins the flag. I hope Norwood wins the flag. Go the under dogs.

I’m still heartbroken and sad, but Darwin gave me more perspective than I coulda bargained for. Or more importantly a reminder to try shift, rework or change it. For example sure this algae bloom situation is fuct, but who knows maybe it means me & the boys will have the water to ourselves?

Like I tried to preface - not a good write up, really just another yarn. Thanks for reading if you got this far.